|
06/08/04
Punishing Parents
Frank Furedi
Spiked-Online
It is a sign of the times that most British commentators take the view that
the amendment to the Children Bill passed by the House of Lords is a 'fudge' or
a 'sensible compromise'.
This so-called compromise criminalises parents who punish their children with
anything more than a light tap. Parents are threatened with prosecution and a
jail sentence if a smack leads to grazes or scratches. The reason why many
regard this new power to police family life as a compromise is because parents
are no longer trusted to punish their children. The campaign against smacking is
driven by a wider agenda that seeks to undercut the right of parents to
discipline their children. The assumption is that in most cases such parental
punishment is likely to have a harmful effect. The principal objective of the
campaign against smacking is to save children from their parents.
The media often refer to the discussion surrounding smacking as a debate, but
it is difficult to pinpoint any differences of substance on this issue. There
are very few robust defenders of smacking. Most proponents strike a defensive
chord and fear being castigated as apologists for child abuse. The only obstacle
that stands in the way of the anti-smacking crusade is the behaviour of the
majority of parents. Surveys carried out on both sides of the Atlantic indicate
that a significant majority of parents continue to use physical punishment to
regulate their children's behaviour. Anti-smacking campaigners recognise that
their main job is to force parents on to the defensive through mounting a
propaganda campaign against them.
The campaign is not simply about the appropriateness of smacking. Many
advocates of a total ban on smacking are against all forms of punishing
children. They believe that parents who rely on the withdrawal of affection as
an alternative to smacking may cause even more damage to a child, and that
punishment designed to make children feel stupid or undignified are just as
ineffective and emotionally dangerous as the physical kind.
'Withdrawal of affection is often used as an alternative to spanking, but in
the opinion of many psychologists, this can be more damaging than corporal
punishment', comments a writer in Nursery World (1). Such concern about
emotional punishment suggests that all power-assertive methods can be criticised
for the alleged damage they inflict on kids. Since it is not realistic to
campaign against the right of parents to punish as such, smacking provides the
crusaders with an emotive target.
Anti-smacking campaigners are often motivated by animosity to all forms of
tough parenting. Their opposition to physical punishment is linked to a wider
hostility to what they perceive as authoritarian parenting styles. The implicit
objective of their campaign is to restrain the exercise of parental authority.
One argument used to undermine parental authority is the claim that children
should not be treated differently to adults. They argue that behaviour that is
unacceptable among adults should not be used against children, decrying the fact
that if a man hits another adult it is called assault, but if he smacks his
child it is called discipline. They assert that the legal defence in English law
of 'reasonable chastisement' in the physical punishment of children legitimises
behaviour that would be illegal if directed against an adult. Yet this
proposition has profound implications for the whole process of child rearing.
What the campaigners are really saying is that we should renounce any attempt to
impose parental will on children and instead negotiate with them as if they were
reasoning adults.
The anti-smacking crusade is always searching for 'research' to corroborate
its prejudice.
In the real world, parents have to do many things to their children that they
would not dream of doing to another adult. From the moment of birth, mothers and
fathers continually impose their will on their babies. Parents who would never
instruct an adult to go to bed have no problem demanding that their child should
go to sleep on the dot at seven o'clock. Parents who check that their child's
bottom is clean are unlikely to do the same to people their own age.
Whenever they wash, feed or read to them in bed, parents unthinkingly treat
their children as children and not as adults. We may wish to negotiate over how
such things are done, but only towards a non-negotiable end, such as making sure
that our child is clean. Smacking is only one of many child-rearing techniques
that is not practised in relationships between adults.
Opponents of smacking claim that scientific research conclusively
demonstrates that smacking has long-term negative effects on the behaviour of
children. They appeal to research to justify their indictment of 'violence
against children'. In The Physical Punishment of Children: Some Input from
Recent Research, Penelope Leach writes that 'respected research tells us that
the more children are hit, the more aggressive, disruptive and anti-social they
are'. According to Leach, research shows that smacking can even lead to criminal
behaviour in adolescence and adulthood.
To support her argument, Leach repeatedly refers to research carried out by
Murray Strauss, a veteran American campaigner against corporal punishment. Yet
Strauss' work is far less clear-cut than the claims made by Leach on its behalf.
Strauss concedes that the case against smacking is 'not truly conclusive' and
raises the question of 'whether advising parents to spank is ethical and
responsible' (2). Strauss believes it is not ethical or responsible - but on
moral grounds rather than on the grounds of scientific research.
There may be good moral arguments for opposing the smacking of children, but
they are not to be found in the realm of scientific research. Despite numerous
studies, nobody has succeeded in establishing a causal relationship between
smacking and negative outcomes for children. That is why the anti-smacking
crusade is always searching for 'research' to corroborate its prejudice.
American opponents of smacking are often disarmingly open about the need to
pursue research that will prove their point and convince parents to abandon
smacking. At a 1996 meeting of the American Academy of Pediatrics, Irwin Hyman
proposed a campaign of what he called 'advocacy research', using bits of
research as propaganda to change public policy.
His colleague Leonard Eron urged the audience to have the courage of their
convictions regardless of the state of current research. 'How much evidence must
we have and how incontrovertible must this evidence be before we can act?' he
pleaded. Other doctors and psychologists attending the conference managed to
retain a measure of objectivity. After hearing the evidence, or lack of it, the
conference refused to condemn smacking (3).
One reason why research has failed to provide the anti-punishment lobby with
ammunition is because the effect of child-rearing styles is variable. It depends
on the quality of the parent-child relationship, social and economic
circumstances, and cultural expectations. There is even some evidence to suggest
that in certain situations, smacking can be an effective disciplinary tool. In
1996, the psychologist Robert Larzelere published a major review of the existing
literature on physical punishment. Focusing on the 35 most rigorous empirical
studies, he concluded that there was no convincing evidence that the non-abusive
smacking typically used by parents damaged children. He also concluded that no
other disciplinary technique - including time-outs and withdrawal of privileges
- was more effective than smacking for gaining the compliance of children under
the age of 13.
Parents who occasionally spank their children are not behaving violently.
Larzelere's conclusions are confirmed by the work of psychologist Diana
Baumrind of the University of California in Berkeley. Baumrind, innovator of the
concept of authoritative parenting, believes that the smacking controversy
wrongly polarises punishment and reasoning. She claims that authoritative
parents are warm, firm and responsive, and that in this context, the occasional
smack will have no long-term damaging effect (4).
Baumrind's approach offers a useful antidote to the dogmatic certainty of the
anti-smacking zealots. The main merit of her work is that she underlines the
context within which disciplining takes place. Her argument is that disciplinary
methods are mediated by children's perceptions of their legitimacy. In the
context of a warm and responsive relationship, children can understand the
imposition of authority, even the occasional smack. Any form of punishment can
have unexpected negative consequences; but such an outcome has less to do with
the form of punishment than with the nature of the parent-child relationship.
The outcome of an act of discipline is closely bound up with how a child
experiences that relationship. That is why the mother and father are in the best
position to work out what form of punishment is appropriate for their child.
Unfortunately, in the zealous climate that surrounds this issue, Baumrind's
sensible approach tends to get overlooked. The terms in which the debate is
framed militate against a reasoned exchange of views. Campaigners define
smacking as violence against children, and argue that violence can only lead to
more violence and therefore it should be stopped.
The argument that violence breeds more violence is a powerful one. Who would
stand up and extol the virtue of violence? However, the equation of smacking
with violence is a verbal trick designed to associate this form of punishment
with abuse. Parents who occasionally spank their children are not behaving
violently. Violence is physical force intended to injure or abuse. Caring
parents who administer a smack in response to a child's act of wilful defiance
with the objective of discouraging unacceptable behaviour are not behaving
violently.
The inability to distinguish violence from caring discipline exercised by
loving parents says more about the outlook of anti-smacking crusaders then about
real-life mothers and fathers. Sir William Utting of Children Are Unbeatable!,
the alliance of 350 organisations that is leading the call for a ban on
smacking, cites the horrific murder of eight-year-old Victoria Climbie by her
great aunt and her great aunt's partner as an example of what can happen when
physical punishment spins out of control. 'The painful truth of the maltreatment
of Victoria Climbie', says Utting, 'is that it started with disciplinary slaps'
(5). This is an outlook that assumes parental abuse is the norm rather than the
exception. Such a harsh view of parental behaviour also extends to a suspicion
of other forms of punishment. But it makes better PR to confine hostility to
punishment to the easy and evocative target of smacking. Smacking serves as a
symbol for a campaign that believes that the exercise of parental authority is
potentially damaging to children.
But make no mistake, the anti-parent crusade will not stop with the partial
banning of smacking. They have already pledged to continue campaigning for a
total ban. Tomorrow they might demand that parents should be criminalised for
using the withdrawal of affection as a form of punishment. The crusade against
smacking has already succeeded in stigmatising parental discipline and forcing
mothers and fathers on to the defensive. As parents become even more confused
about how to discipline their offspring, children too will become disoriented by
a lack of clarity about what is expected of them.
The only beneficiaries of this powerful crusade are the professional
lobbyists who are in the business of saving children from their own parents.
|